Jailhouse Cat

You've heard of the doghouse before, right? Well, this is the cathouse a.k.a. cat jail.

You may wonder why a great cat, like me, ended up behind bars.

I often end up in jail on laundry day. If I beg too much for Fancy Feast, this is what happens. My Big-Cats don't like when I whine.

Truth be told, it's not such a bad place. The laundry is warm, it's somewhat dark and I feel safe. I have watched enough Law & Order to know that this isn't like Rikers Island.

PK

Another guest in my backyard tonight!!

There was a rascally raccoon on my catio tonight. It came right up to my patio-door window, looked me square in the eyes, and tried to get in.

I leaped at the window in fury cursing and howling with all my might.

My Middle-Cat spotted the raccoon and called for the Big-Cat. He came running and threw things at the big furry beast (which appeared to be about 30 pounds of fury). When that didn't work, the Big-Cat grabbed his hockey stick and chased the raccoon out of the yard and up a tree.

The Big-Cat kept swinging the hockey stick like he was going after a pinata; so the raccoon leaped into a tall hedge...which is when the neighbour's dog entered into the picture and started barking like a mad dog.

The raccoon turned tail and ran for the hills.

I have never been so glad to hear a dog bark before.

I hope the raccoon never comes back...he was so big, he looked like he could have eaten me as a snack.

A scary evening for sure!!
PK

SNOW?????

WTF? It's almost March!!
PK

How I write my blogs

Like all good writers, I have a special place where I write and a special computer to write with (I'm a Mac user...I could never figure out how to use DOS and I don't do Windows).

The toes on my paws are very short and so I can't use a keyboard very well. As a result, I'm still holding out hope that Steve Jobs (he seems like a cat person) will invent meow-recognition software so I will be able to write the great Canadian novel that is in my head.

The novel will start with a young, good-looking cat who is a private eye by day and then.....

The First Cat

I heard some very sad news this weekend. Socks, the First Cat during the Clintons' eight years in the White House has died of mouth cancer.

I always liked seeing Socks on the TV in the 1990s. It made me hopeful that the world was in good paws. I think a good part of the economic boom of the 1990s was due (in a small part) to having Socks in the White House.

My condolences go out to Chelsea, Bill, and Hillary.
PK

Time to work out?

When I work out, I don't like to have anything substantial in my belly (which may be why I don't work out very often).

Anyway, today the big-cats are off to the gym and so I thought I'd do a home workout. To be properly fueled for that, I needed a Boost.

I had forgotten how tasty they were and I ended up with the Boost all over the table and my cat-suit.

Maybe I should do this work out thing more often.
PK

Who is the Prime Minister of Canada?

Did I miss a Canadian federal election recently? I usually don't concern myself with politics so it's possible.

The reason for my confusion is that there is a picture of Michael Ignatieff and President Barack Obama being played over and over again on the BIG screen in Times Square, New York (as well as on another big screen on The Strip in Las Vegas).

Is this like what happened to give us Prime Minister Poutine in 1999? or is President Obama showing us who he'd vote for (if he could)?

PK

Oh... to be 19.

Imagine my sadness today. After a full day of waiting for the Big-Cats to come home, they finally arrived and then promptly dashed out the door again. The reason? To go to the neighbourhood pub.

They said I can't come with them 'til I'm 19. That's four more people years. Or 28 cat years. *Sigh*

Does anyone know where I can get fake ID?
PK

Neighbourhood hockey game

When my Big-Cat was younger, he used to get together with his friends and brother and play street hockey (it was Vancouver, there was no ice outside).

I came across this backyards hockey rink the other day when I was on the internet looking for sale priced Fancy Feast. I've never been on skates, but I think this rink looks like it's more fun than playing on the street yelling "Car" every once in a while.
PK

PS Too bad the builders were Oilers fans.

Guns

I don't understand why there are so many guns in the City of Vancouver right now. I'm a cat, with very sharp claws, so I don't need any weapons other than my own deadly talons.

I used to think the right to bare arms meant that big-cats wore short sleeve shirts; now I understand that I was reading it incorrectly.

It seems there are so many people bearing arms in the City of Vancouver. I wish they would put down their guns and, as Ari Gold has said many times, "Just hug it out, bitch."

Can't we all just get along?
PK

Just call me P-Kiddy

I heard recently that Joaquin Pheonix has decided to give up acting and become a hip-hop star; so I've decided to give it a shot too.

Here is a clip of a recent interview on David Letterman (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x1IncP6xjfg). It's very awkward to watch. I just hope that Joaquin is acting a part because he doesn't look so good.

If I ever let my fur look as bad as Joaquin's does, someone please stage an intervention.
PK

Clothes shopping...cat style.

I love to explore to find new clothes and to find a nice warm place to sleep.

I've been know to crawl into a pile of clean laundry or a chest of drawers to find a treasure or two.

One of my favorite places to be is the laundry basket after clean clothes have come out of the dryer. It's warm and dark and smells really nice.
PK

PS This is a photo, years ago, of me exploring my Big-Cat's chest-of-drawers ...notice the big pile of dirty laundry beside the chest-of-drawers. Both the Big-Cat and I are sure lucky he found the Middle-Cat!!

I have always loved music

Here's a kitten-picture of me sitting with my Big-Cat's stereo. Notice all the tapes....which should give you an idea of how old I am.

While I like all kinds of music, I am partial to Cats Stevens, the Pussy Cat Dolls, and Atomic Kitten.

Notice how my ears are perked up in this picture....either someone is opening a can of tuna somewhere or the Cure's "The Love Cats" is playing.
PK

A few strings attached

When I was younger, I was so poor that I had to eat kibble (no Fancy Feasts).

At Christmas time, I could not afford to buy toys, so I used to get a piece of string to play with in the tub.
PK

PS And it was uphill both going to and from the litter box.

Baby photos

Here is a picture of me when I was a kitten. I don't remember being that small.

My Big-Cat used to tease me that my ears were so large, I could tune into Radio Moscow without a radio.

I never thought that was very funny. Besides, why would I listen to Radio Moscow? I don't even speak Russian.
PK

Valentine's Day

You know, I've never had a Valentine's Day present before and I don't care. I think it's a silly made up Hallmark holiday.

Why should my big-cats or I listen to a big gift-card company tell us that on one random day they picked as being special we should spend three times as much money as we would have on the day before for some dead plants. I don't need anything like that...as long as I have a Fancy Feast.
PK

I was so angry last night

My Big-Cat and I were having a nice, quiet evening at home last night (the Middle-Cat was working). We had dinner (whitefish Fancy Feast for me), watched a little TV, and were enjoying some quiet time (Big-Cat was reading in the front room) when I saw a strange cat come into MY backyard.

He walked right up to the patio door, sniffed my cat-mat, and was going to sit on my catio. The Big-Cat was in the other room and didn't see the invader; so I started screaming and yelling and hissing...and then threw myself at the patio glass door (I refer to my attacking style as a catskrieg).

The Big-Cat came running just in time to see the invader-cat running away from the patio door. We then opened the door and chased the invader-cat out of MY yard.

A little while later, the Middle-Cat came home and we told her what had happened. We all went outside again and I sniffed around to make sure the yard was safe for my big-cats. After a couple minutes, we all went inside.

A couple hours later the big-cats went to bed but I stayed downstairs to make sure we had no late night visitors. I didn't get much sleep last night, so I'm a little extra tired today.

I'll let you know if anything exciting happens today.

PK

25 Things about Me

There's a new craze on Facebook. People are tagging each other with references in their Facebook accounts listing 25 things about themselves.

So, even though I have not been asked yet, I have decided to do 25 things about me:

1) The best people in the world are my Big-Cat and my Middle-Cat.
2) My favourite blogs (beside mine) are Mika's (http://www.mika-ryan.blogspot.com/), Janice's (http://www.lifewithscott.blogspot.com/), and Dawn's (http://maggyandme.blogspot.com/).
3) My favourite food is Fancy Feast.
4) I used to like to play fetch with paper balls and plastic bottle caps when I was a kitten.
5) I like to sit in bags of all types (suitcases, plastic, paper, knapsacks, etc).
6) I get really shy around strangers and when I get scared, I hiss.
7) I would like to go to Hawaii one day (I hear they have lots of sand); but I don't like airplanes.
8) I'm scared of the ceiling fan in my big-cats' bedroom.
9) I like to sleep under the covers or under a blanket.
10) I'll be 15 years old this March.
11) One of my favourite places to sleep is on the bath mat (because the floor is heated).
12) I've never caught a mouse or a bird; but I'd like to.
13) I need a step stool to get onto the bedside table to get onto my big-cats' bed.
14) I like rap-music.
15) When I eat grass, I throw up.
16) In the summer, I like to sit on the outside catio and warm my bones.
17) I like it when my big-cats are sick 'cause they sleep on the couch and I get to sleep on them all day.
18) I like McDonalds french fries and the foam on Starbucks lattes.
19) My favourite treats are Pounces.
20) I don't like to wear clothes; no matter how much the Middle-cat wants me to.
21) The person I fear the most is Dr Stacy.
22) I like to race people up the stairs and I usually win.
23) I love the smell of minty-fresh breath.
24) My boyfriend's name is Gus (he's a dog).
25) I've never had a job; I'm a kept cat.

That's it.
PK